The International Rot Rating Hangover Classification System [©2015] explained:
Rot 1: A little tired but otherwise fine. The only real sign you've been been out drinking is the cash you've spent.
Rot 2: A bit spaced out and unsure of yourself, but nothing a packet of crisps and cup of tea or coffee wouldn't put right.
Rot 3: Tired and 'jumpy'. Work is manageable, provided human interaction is kept to a minimum. Come the afternoon, it should have passed.
Rot 4: As above but communication has now become problematic. You fancy a cooked breakfast, are dehydrated and have a mild headache. It will not be a productive day.
Rot 5: A fully formed headache, with added paranoia. You can just about cope with work, although it's a real effort to string coherent sentences together. Must have water.
Rot 6: You're on the ibuprofen but feel queasy and fatigued. A fried breakfast is no longer appealing but you could probably manage a bacon sandwich. If it's a weekday, you will consider phoning in sick. Must have Lucozade.
Rot 7: Your headache is debilitating and you feel nauseous. You may actually still be slightly drunk. Hair of the dog would sort things out, if you were so inclined. Doing any work is out of the question.
Rot 8: Your eyes hurt, your head is pounding and you may very soon be sick. You can only tolerate certain food stuffs, like crisps and toast. Noise offends, and hair of the dog is no longer an option.
Rot 9: As above except eating is right out. If you haven't already thrown up then you think about actually inducing it. Movement of any kind makes you feel ten times worse. You want to cry.
Rot 10: You have vomited - more than once. Your head feels like it might explode, the mere sight of food repels, and you have succumbed to a deep depression. You would sleep it off if you only could but instead toss and turn relentlessly, and vow never to drink again.
